ADULT CRYING
It's normal to think
that what makes people cry are the sad things. This thought makes perfect sense
when we are children and cry because we are hungry, have cramps or want to sleep.
But when you get older and mature, it gets a little weird. However, it is the
human condition. Do we cry for the same reasons or for others?
I went into a
public office and I saw a lady in tears. I did not understand: nothing
comforted her. Therefore, we deduce she had dealt with or talked to someone not
affable, rude, stupid.
Yes, lack of patience,
education and rudeness are the most obvious and the most severe reasons for
making the tears run down fast. There are two kinds of crying. That one which drains
and exhaust us. And the other which has a salty taste when it drips, touches us
on the lips and comes along with a relief, the one that make us feel alive.
We cry when we feel
strong love. When we face our destiny. When we feel trapped. As we walk free. We cry for both joy and pain.
We cry during war and during the victory. I noticed that there is this bias, the
ambiguity of crying. It does not necessarily have to come from things that are harrowing
or terrible. We also cry when we come across charms. For special grace. For the
epiphany of life.
I cry even when I wake
up from a good dream, or watching a soap opera kiss. When I feel a very strong
kindness towards me, and for a moment time could stop and it could last
forever. At that moment, everything makes sense.
Have you ever watched
the movie Before Midnight, by Richard Linklater? The characters (a couple) are on a weekend in
Greece and go to a hotel room where he promised “a quality time’’ between them,
after all, the landscape was ideal and beyond inspiring. However, there is a
stronger reason why they are there: to come clean with each other. They blame
each other for every disappointment and abandonment they suffered. The couple
is so upset, they need each other so much, however, they cannot take some time
for themselves whenever they’d like, and it makes them angry. But they realize life
is like that, and will not stop fighting for each other in the future. And this
moment touched me with empathy and tenderness for the human being, for the
weakness and difficulty of living alone.
In the movie, what
began with a bitter trigger – “I do not love you anymore, you've ruined my
whole life” − finished with “I'm so sorry we must break up, but I love you as I
always have loved you”. They are fighting for their connection, for what they
build together. Very beautiful, isn’ it? I shed some tears when I came to the
conclusion that passion carries so many illusions, as love brings forth the truth.
By Gabriel Colombo
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