The Life of Gabriel

            

(Un) Sustainable Lightweight

Living requires patience. Love, much more. I reminded the theory of Liquid Love (the fragile, fearful and ephemeral love of our time). And I remember that, by the time I did a thorough research, I predicted an improvement from the liquidity of relationships. I thought that, at some point, the picture would change due to an inevitable hangover of so much lack of consistency.

In the midst of the mess of my boxes with cutouts, pictures, and pages of books, I sat down to read some excerpts and reflect on it so I could write for you, dear reader (and never underestimate the depth of the reflections that arise in the midst of epiphanies within those  moments we are detached from the material world, focused on our thoughts and plans. We have never been so “liquid”. When did we unlearn how to love?

To love someone is not to jump off on the first problem (regardless of its magnitude). Love requires care, growth, tolerance, commitment, empathy. We lost the patience to deal with the other − one with a life baggage completely different from ours, one with an inner life that we do not control, with his or hers own wishes. Too difficult, we prefer to stay in the safety of our individuality, of our usual and non-threatening solitude, so we
can deal with the issues or just play down the rug  without anyone interfering. In a relationship, when a problem arises, it is as if we are dealing with an internet text that is too long , with which you lose your patience in the middle and jump to another one faster, simpler and more objective, so you can move on to another one soon enough.

You cannot waste time getting deeper, stressing, so you what do you do? We live in a world where so many are lazy to love, so many are lost − as Bauman says − in the “unsustainable lightness of sex and common life”. I find it a very sad insight. It is through challenges that the other – by simply exercising his otherness − brings us to discover new capacities, new sides of ourselves, new visions of the world, our own trajectories and traumas. I expect "a new beginning, filled with fine, elegant and sincere people, with the ability to say more yes than not"

Time flies, amore. And outside, there is a beautiful sunlight waiting on us.

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Written by G. Colombo

The Life of Gabriel

 

A SMALL MOBILE

AND A HUGE HIDDEN PASSION

 

An espresso with whipped cream. That was what I had on that cold autumn afternoon while sitting at the table, in the company of the girl. It didn’t stick to the script, though, because he had arrived late for the meeting.

I knew her by sight. We came across each other a few times. And in one of these moments, we agreed to have a coffee at Patisserie Valerie, next to the Marble Arch. The chemistry between us was palpable. I might have a crush on her, and vice versa.

We talked about the weather and how meteorologists study so much and always make mistakes. Then she asked if I was single. Our eyes met at the moment I said “yes”. And keenly, we smiled at each other.

She told me:

− I was in a relationship, he is two years older than me, it lasted a few months. Oh, you don't know how much I suffered.

I replied:

− Relationships can be complicated and...

− We were done overnight. One day we had a silly fight. And no, we didn't live together. He comforted himself with a mutual friend of ours.

She continued:

−  I heard about it because this friend called me, and said that my boyfriend had been at her house to vent some problems… but that is beside the point. Talk about yourself, Gabriel.

− Well, I...       

She interrupted me by saying

−  Do you know what that friend told me? That he confessed that our fight had been a good one. We were having brunch in Camden Town, which made him move to South London. He said that I have a strong temper, he even said that I am too explosive and that I don't respect his point of view. Oh, is he ever dating someone like me?

I only managed to say:

− Wow… that's complicated.

But deep inside I thought that t talking about the ex-boyfriend on a first date is rather unpleasant.

But she wasn’t happy yet:

− That's not the worst, though. The worst thing is that he came back home the day before yesterday apologizing to me. Asking to come back. I don't want anything with him anymore. Do you think I’d want it? And I pressured him to admit that he had sex with this friend of ours who I think you should know, but I would not like to expose the name.

Then I asked:

− What's up? Did they sleep together or not?

Yes. Now that a month has passed I want to be very well accompanied to turn the tables and show him that I have a new love and give him a hi just to see that I don't need him. Oh, let me show you a picture of him here on my mobile.

My thought didn't have to fly very far to notice that she was trying to make amends. And to remind myself that people have this bad habit of involving third parties in an attempt to rescue their failed relationships.

I kindly excused myself and got up from the chair. I didn’t really want to go to the toilet, but quickly run away and go to my house. I said I forgot to feed my cat; if I don't feed him, he cries. And I'm sorry, of course. 

Ciao ciao for her.

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 Essay by Gabriel Colombo

- Journalist / Content Writer / Editor -

The Life Of Gabriel

 

                               MIDNIGHT ON MARYLEBONE

     

                      Ironically, I’ve found myself facing the problem of my life

 

I was trying to write a book in one go. Cough. With the fixed idea that everything was valid in the age of innovation. My fingers hesitated between finding myself or talking to the walls. For a while, they were enough. Everything was very white, ready to be filled. And I was static. Innocent and unprepared like a new born baby. I began to write a future for which I had no plans. I survived the night with cigarettes and a thousand thoughts around me.

Meeting ironically with the problem of my life. I was puzzled by the speed of my thoughts. I wanted life to be like writing books, so I could sketch and play outside if it didn't make sense to me.

The sin of laziness began. I was studying in an expensive school. The place was jaw-dropping, but I discovered it wasn't the pretense. I was looking in the wrong place. Screaming through a void that the last name would be the pleasure of catharsis.

If I am single, you are just jealous.

Gabriel Colombo

The Life of Gabriel

 

275 MILLIMETERS OF PRECIPITATION

by Gabriel Colombo

 

Inevitably, I fell in love. The day was very sunny, one of those we would be happy just because the weather is perfect. My daily infatuated-hooked-by-the-cupid mood was also out in the sun.

I've been wanting to fall in love. Yeah. That's when I found a sweetheart, I put some ornaments here, hung a chandelier there. Postponed the ophthalmologist. I did not change my glasses degree. I pretended not to notice the imperfections, nor manufacturing defects. Easy. So everything turned great… at least for me.

In one of these hot raves, in the melee, I tore an earring from her ear by accident. She forgot it somewhere. I was going to give two pairs as a gift.

But whenever we hugged each other, she decided to collect the earring lost in the trenches. I would kiss her cheek and she would ask me for a Trident, a strawberry gun or a mint one. I would give it to her, but I felt like I was kissing myself. I shouldn’t have left the house, but the sun was so bright outside.

Before we met, I would call and ask: “Hi, is everything okay?”. And I’d heard the same old litany:  "It is not. I did not pass and I think I never will  the OAB North American Test. It was gruesome. I left the Legal hermeneutics part and every Constitutional parachute blank”. Doesn’t she know that, when we ask “Hello, what’s up?”, the answer should be simply "It’s all good", without specifics?

But then she came up with proposals: speaking another language or riding the rollercoaster. It was hard to refuse the invitations. I hesitating between “I can’t” and “I won’t”, but I’d go anyway, or she would come and meet me.

On a tour within our country, I destroyed an anthill. I felt guilty... Kind of. At the time, I felt as I was the exterminator. She reproached me as a popular jury that condemns a serial killer, and told all her friends that I was evil, “but deep down, he has a good heart, but has a bad family”. Look who’s talking. She dated a guy that looked just like Justin Timberlake. Every time he talks, he swears. He would sell his own mother. The woman does not remain silent for more than five seconds.

Soon I felt like an exotic fish or a rare blue macaw. I could not bear to be exposed like that. I would stay home and support her, help decorating the house for the dinners with her parents, but I’d be called crazy for putting the elbows on the table. And I was famous for killing ants.

My crimes are no bigger than those of others. But if I was her, I might be unsure. To begin a relationship with a transgressor of the fauna and the flora and, why not, the whole motherland?

But I have already done reiki, acupuncture, I went to a "gym" as I know, therefore, that the positive side of a person is the most important. And it wins. I know for sure who I am and it will not be some mad woman who forgot her gold-plated earring at the hotel that is going to mess up my path. But the wind continues to blow. Everything I did brought it to know myself a little bit more

The business went on. A friend of mine read on Twitter the following sentence: “Frees yourself from the tyranny that intimidates you”. I had t

From today on, whether it's sunny or not, I'll just make plans to be happy when it rains. I’ll let a thunderstorm pour on me.

 

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*All rights reserved to the Author G, Colombo.